Posted: 2017-12-07 23:26
So, the real question is what do you do about it? For one, I wouldn’t attend his romantic solo tutoring session created specifically for you. If he’s saying those things in front of people imagine what he might say—or do—when it’s just you two in a room alone. Ew. He may not actually be a total creep, but you’re probably better off getting tutoring from a classmate if he makes you uncomfortable. Think about it—you won’t be able to focus and learn when you’re on your guard the whole time.
The second option, Not Hot for Teacher, is to tell him that what he’s doing makes you uncomfortable. Don’t make a display out of it. Do it in private during office hours and say, “Mr. Horndog (but actually use his name), it makes me uncomfortable when you use my nickname and make comments about my appearance. I’d appreciate it if you’d stop.” Now, he’ll probably get defensive and say that he didn’t mean anything by what he said, but it doesn’t matter what he meant. Say, “It’s fine, you don’t have to explain. I’d just like you to stop. Thanks.” Remember, you’re not debating his intentions with him, you’re telling him how you feel about it, and as your teacher he needs to respect that—period. He may not be aware that he’s making uncomfortable. While you feel a little harassed, he may think you’re cool with it in his creeper brain. Until you say something, he’ll probably continue.
This means you just let nature take its course. You wait for the bleeding to start and for the pregnancy to pass. For very early pregnancies, like chemical pregnancies which never registered a heartbeat, this is often the recommended route. My very first miscarriage—where I didn’t really know I was pregnant until the prior day—passed this way, and it felt like a really late period. (Had I not taken three pregnancy tests, that’s what I would have assumed it was.)
Here’s the deal: if you think he’s flirting, he’s flirting. So, if you’re getting that creeper vibe, that’s enough to say he is. I think he’s flirting and I can’t even see his body language or anything. He calls you by your nickname when you didn’t ask him to, he takes care to notice your appearance—and keep track of it—and he makes comments on said appearence, directly to your face. Plus, the weird note on your quiz. That’s a little inappropriate there, Professor Horndog. But here’s the nail in the coffin: he’s not doing these things to anyone else (or so you say). I mean, if he was, it would still be inappropriate, but it’s obvious he’s shown a specific interest in you, lady. And it sounds like you’re not interested in his version of extra credit.
There are many ways to lose a pregnancy—from the traditional bleeding in the toilet, to a missed miscarriage where you don’t even know that you miscarried, to a blighted ovum where the baby never started growing at all, to an ectopic pregnancy, where the fetus implanted in the wrong place. I’ve had most of them—they all suck, let me tell you—and I’ve learned the important ways to deal with a miscarriage.
If you have surgery you can get what is medically called “the products of conception” tested. That means they can chromosomally test your fetus and see what, if anything, was wrong with it. For older patients, patients undergoing IVF, or in my non-medical opinion, any patient, it is a great comfort to find out that something was wrong with the fetus, which is why it didn’t make it. On the other hand, if they find out that there was nothing wrong with the baby—that it was chromosomally normal—you can investigate other solutions to prevent it from recurring.
I’m in college. My professor never really bothered me before, but now I’m starting to question him. I changed my hair to red one day and he complimented how nice it was even though I hated it. I have never seen him comment on anyone else’s appearance. A few days later I dressed up pretty fashionable and changed my hair back to black ‘cause I was going out that night with my boyfriend and he said, “Wow another look, Nice!” I brushed it off.
Then, another time in class, I was talking to my friend and asked her to call me by my nickname. He overheard, asking me why I didn’t ask him to do that. I just told him I found no reason to, but ever since then he calls me by my nickname anyway. He also gave us a quiz and one of the questions asked what we thought he could do to make the class better. I said “one day out the week for tutoring would be nice.” Here’s where things get a little weird.